A single choice and actions carried out impact many lives. The ramification of a sing choice has a long term rippling effect.
In light of traumatic events the are two camps in which the general public lands reactive or responsive. both camps have the commonality tao normal as it was prior to the traumatic event is gone.
Saturday morning the mention of Orlando would predominantly bring to mind memories of laughter, perhaps a mouse, castles, princesses, pirates or various themed parks with hopes and excitement of visiting one day or reflection of a trip taken upon a day.
Sunday morning, everything changed and now people are looking for answers, help and escape from the nightmare.
One of the happiest places on the planet reels in crisis and our hearts go out to the victims their families and citizens of Orlando.
With so heightened concerns, fear, and a long road of healing for those present I wanted t offer some verbal first aid.
What is common and what you can do to move from survival to stability.
SURVIVAL can be exhausting an is at its best following a crisis an emotive time of reaction for most victims. For the circumstances this in common place and and a temporary normal. It is a place of transition, but you want t take measure not to get stuck there emotional, psychological or physically. There are phase of change that can be expected. Those phases are Survival, stability, success, and significance.
What to do to move beyond survival:
Create a mental anchor. A mental anchor is what it sounds like. Similar to a ship dropping anchor to stop floating, a mental anchor establishes what has stopped, what is no and what can be done to move ahead in a direction of healing what is shattered.
How to establish the mental anchor: Recognize and anchor in your mind with resolve that the event and worst of its occurrence is over. The gun shots are no longer being fired. The gunman no longer lives, the same threat causing fear, anxiety, and a vast range of emotions has stopped.
Verbalize facts. “The worst is over for now.” It is important to say it out load. Verbally process. “The worst IS over, the gun man is dead and the shooting has stopped.” “The threat is over and I need to get a plan to move forward.” As much as I want answers, what I need right now is to take care of me.” I need to take care of me so I can be of most help to others who the time is best and right so we can all come through this as stronger neighbors.
Ask for help. There is no shame in needing help and whether you thing you need it or not, ask someone not present during the critical incident to be your bud for the next few weeks. In military terms, it takes the strength of a warrior to ask for help. Do it, because you do need it.
Enlist someone to let you know if they see changes in your ability to sleep, eat, focus, or enjoy some entertaining activity. This person must be a form of encouragement and accountability for you to take the steps to move ahead i healthy ways.
Refrain from substance use. Smoking, drinking, and drugs can spiral. While you may want to “chill” this is not the time to take a vulnerable and high risk situation to behavior of self medicating.
7. Find a support or community group that will offer debriefing or aftercare. If you can’t find such
care, get in touch and arrange for such care at ConflictResolutionSpeaker.com groups on line.